Every Day Is An Adventure

Coming to Cameroon many people said, “Everyday will be like a new adventure.”  We did not think too much about the daily adventures as we were more concerned with getting here and surviving.  Being here 4 months we realize the people that told us about the daily adventures were right.  So far most of the adventures we have come across have been welcomed and quite entertaining. We have had a few that we could have lived without, but that is part of the experience. Right now as I reflect on our lives here I realize how easy these adventures could have been missed, if I was living my regular life in the States.  I also believe many similar daily adventures took place at home but I was too focused on my life to notice. 

What are some of the daily adventures we have faced?  Last week as I was collecting the clothes off the clothesline a man walking his pig came through our backyard.  I greeted him and didn’t think too much of the situation.  Maybe I am getting too used to life here, what’s the big deal about a man walking a pig with a rope tied around one its back legs?  The neighbor yelled to my kids to come out and see the pig.  Of course, the pig was a big hit.  Clare loved petting her, Patrick was scared to death of the large animal, and Honora enjoyed watching her brother’s reaction.   

As we chatted with the man (that was missing his two front teeth and wearing flip flops I would have thrown out a long time ago) we learned he lived just down the hill from our backyard.  I inquired about how many pigs he had and he responded with “so many.”  He then invited us down to see his pigs and other animals.  As we peered into the pigsty we realized he did have “so many” pigs with about 20 newborn piglets.  The little piglets were cute but I can’t say the same for the momma pigs.  We moved on to see mother goose and her chicks.  Those little fuzzy chicks were adorable.  Then he asked if we wanted to see the guinea pigs.  Again, Clare was excited so he got a couple guinea pigs out for the kids to hold.  The farmer was having fun showing the animals to the kids.  It was difficult to judge who had the biggest smile, the kids or the farmer.  All this happened on a “normal” evening of preparing dinner.  The best part is we were able to meet our neighbor, Michael. (Do not confuse the farmer, Michael with the next door neighbor Michael or the priest, Fr. Michael).

One morning we woke up to find McDonalds in our backyard.  The next door neighbors transformed their outdoor kitchen, where they cook over a fire, into a McDonalds with some chalk.  They wrote, “McDonalds-milkshakes, cheeseburgers, pizza, coffee and customer security assured.”   We appreciated their desire to please us and the good laugh.  The next night we came home from being out to hear music in our backyard.  The kids ran out to see the neighbors cooking and listening to music.  Once our kids got outside the music went up and we could hear lots of laughter.  The kids were learning to salsa dance.  We added our blinking flashlight and had a dance party.

For my birthday our wonderful missionary companions, the Newburns, agreed to babysit so Maura and I could go out.  We were on our way home walking and noticed a man fall over on his motorcycle.  Looking closer we could see it was the next door neighbor, the father.  By the time we ran to help, he had already gotten up.  He dusted off his clothes and was fine.  He mentioned he was going to see someone from church that was sick and we were to go with him.  This did not seem like a choice so we followed him to the woman’s house.  We entered the house to find a woman in bed recovering from surgery she had earlier that morning.  After offering our words of encouragement and prayers we were back heading home.  That is life in Cameroon, walking down the road and ten minutes later we find ourselves in a woman’s bedroom praying for her recovery.  The moment with her and the neighbor was the highlight of my birthday celebration.

The adventures will continue and we look forward to most of them.  We are not too excited about the adventure of dry season and not having water for a week at a time.  Adventures with critters will continue as well.  This morning I found a stream of ants from the front door to my shoes.  Picking up my shoes I found hundreds of eggs and baby ants.  In the 10 hours I did not wear my shoes a colony of ants moved in.  After discovering the colony I removed it within minutes.  I guess this goes with living so close to nature.

As I write about these adventures I realize how open we are to each of them.  Being in a foreign land makes us aware of what is around us.  Like I said, I believe similar adventures were happening in front of me in the States but I did not have the increased awareness that I have in Cameroon.  We have a much greater dependence on those around us here too.  This dependence has led us to an invitation to participate in life at a deeper level.  The need for others increases the gratitude for the people around us.  I am sorry to say that when I have my independence I tend to forget about those around me.  Living a life that is more simple, but just as busy, permits us to be freer to any possibility of an adventure right before our eyes. 

-Ryan

Greeting

During our formation in Los Angeles we heard plenty about culture.  We were given a general idea of what the culture in Cameroon might be like and ways to see the gifts within all cultures.  I knew it would be a learning experience the entire three years of our mission.  After being here for three months I thought I might have the slightest insight of what makes up life here.  We discovered quickly that greeting people you pass is very important.  From observing people greet us we learned you say good morning/afternoon/evening and ask how they are.  Everyone that we meet with the children greet our kids first and ask them how they are.  The automatic response is “fine.”  Our kids have learned to offer a handshake and answer with “fine.”  We thought Patrick had this concept down until he started running away from people the past few days.  We were a little embarrassed when he ran away from greeting the Bishop.  Thankfully the Bishop is a wise man and knew Patrick was just being a two year old.

Maura and I thought we were doing well with our greeting of people and conversation starters.  We found after talking with a Cameroonian for some time neither of us would know each others names.  I find it more personal to know a person’s name so I try to be sure to ask early in the conversation.  Then it occurred to me that maybe there is a reason people do not disclose their names while talking to them.  An opportunity came up for me to ask a Cameroonian why they do not share their names when talking with me.  The response was that it is rude to talk about yourself and you would not want to put a person in that position by asking their name.  All right, now I know, to find out people’s names you have to go about it in a roundabout way.  I have yet to master the roundabout way of figuring out names but it will be fun to figure how. 

After discovering I have been asking people their names improperly I decided I better see if my greet was correct.  We were talking with my neighbors and they asked if in the U.S. we would greet people walking by.  I explained my thoughts on the matter and asked how I should greet people here.  To my surprise I learned I was to ask someone how they were only if I knew them well.  I would have to know them well in the event they needed me to help them.  I interpreted that as when you ask someone how they are, it is meant to be genuine with the possibility of offering assistance if needed.  A younger person should never ask someone older how he/she is because the younger person is not able to offer assistance.  Asking this assumes the older person is not able to care for him/herself and it is an insult.  Looks like I better work on my greeting so I do  not offend anyone. 

The greatest gift of this culture is that people are very understanding of the guest.  The final words of our neighbor was that people know we are trying to be friendly and appreciate us acknowledging them.  This does explain why I am mentally exhausted each night from having to think about just how to greet someone.  I find discovering these little or possibly big nuisances as exciting and it is what makes it so fun to live in another culture.

Peace-

Ryan

With the neighbors

Martin Family Update

Life has gotten very busy here.  Much of our time is busy with a common theme of waiting.  We are waiting for the internet guy to come.  We are waiting for the fruit, eggs and veggies to have soaked 30 minutes in the iodine solution so that they are disinfected.  We are waiting for the water to boil to warm the bath for the kids.  I am waiting for the rain to stop so I can walk to the market.  I am still learning to manage my time in the land of no short cuts.  Flexibility is key.  Often plans have to be discarded and new ones embraced because the electricity or water are off, and when someone says they will do something “tomorrow” it does not mean tomorrow.  It is a reference simply to the future.  Although the pace of life has slowed down it remains very busy.

Patrick is an expert in busy.  He always seems to have a plan and he is getting better and better at expressing what that plan is.  He is putting on his shoes to go visit “the boys” or “Michael” (our neighbors) in the “kitchen.”  He is playing “soccer” or “cars” or with “the girls.”  He loves being outside.  He is constantly collecting sticks and he keeps me busy reminding him to leave them at the door when he enters the house.  He is right at home in the Cameroonian culture.  In August I looked out the back door to see him playing with an old plate that he was using to collect treasures of rocks and sticks.  A few minutes later I glanced out and watched him stand up, pick up the plate, and place it on his head to carry it to another location.  Now I just need to wait until he is a little bigger and he can join the neighborhood kids in collecting water from the spring and carrying it home on his head when the water is out.  

One of my highlights in life with Patrick is his singing.  He joins in song whenever it is heard.  Mass here is a cultural delight with music and dancing.  It is definitely fun to watch the community sing and dance down the aisle during the offertory, and Patrick joins in with his little voice.  He rocks and claps and brings a smile to the faces of many.  Every night I climb into bed with him to cuddle and sing a lullaby.  I could barely stop the laughter, when about a month ago I complied with his request for “Rain drops on roses” only to hear him belt out the lyrics and melody in his baby voice.  He has learned how to gallop which he refers to as skipping.  Often now if he is going somewhere, he gallops there with “I skip, I skip.”  He is independent and loving.  Earlier this week I was feeling homesick.  I couldn’t help my eyes from tearing up.  Patrick looked up and enquired “Mommy sad?” I nodded “yes.”  He questioned “kleenex?” and soon he was off to retrieve me a kleenex.

Clare Rosie has been a little down this past week.  I think the “honeymoon” of Cameroonian life may be over for her as well.  She is normally a very gentle, loving little girl, but she was acting out so we knew something was not right.  She disclosed to Ryan that it is not very fun here.  “We don’t go anywhere or do anything fun” was her complaint.  It looks like we may have to start venturing off the compound. :)  Yesterday we went to Njinikom for a celebration of a 100 years of faith in the Archdiocese of Bamenda.  Another missionary family from Mission Doctors is there and the Newburn family from Lay Mission Helpers joined us.  Between the Burket-Thoene, Newburn and our family there was 10 kids running around.  I think this fit Clare’s bill for “fun.”  The house was ringing with her laughter.

Clare Rosie loves coming to the market with me and I enjoy her company.  It is quite a hike for her little legs, but she never complains.  I love listening to her make sense of the world around her.  She, like Patrick, has taken on the Cameroonian culture without a second thought.  She now uses a baby blanket to tie her dolls to her back as the Cameroonian mamas do.  She is also the only one in our family to take on “squatting” (there are no public bathrooms and unless there is a sign posted “no urinating” anywhere seems to be free game).  Last week she disclosed to me as she passed through the living room, “I figured out a new way of squatting.”  Heaven help me.

Honora continues to be a very reflective child.  She told Ryan there other night during our bedtime ritual of prayer, sharing about the day, and cuddles.  “People are so picky about life, we should just be grateful to God that we are alive.”  It was a good reflection for her parents to hear, when both of us were feeling a little discouraged by our lack of access to the internet.  We notice that she has taken on Cameroonian manners of speech.  She is also a little encyclopedia on the random tidbits of information that she has heard in conversation.  She colors the tree trunks in her pictures red “because that wood burns the best.”  Good burning wood is vital for a place where people cook over open fires.

Homeschool has started and Honora is really blossoming.  She was very nervous about starting school.  I thought it was simply because she was nervous about a new school, so I was surprised that the night before homeschool that she was in tears.  She told me that she does not like school.  It was very sad to hear this from a little girl who loves books and has questions about everything.  I explained what school would be like and she has been very excited ever since.  She also is looking forward to going to the local school for religion class.  Honora has made friends with the neighbors as well, and she is looking forward to learning how to make puff-puff (Cameroonian doughnuts) with Mrs. Loveleen.

Ryan has been wonderful with the kids, as I have transitioned to work.  I know he is doing a wonderful job as “Daddy” when the kids wake up and completely bypass me to cuddle with him.  He has also met more of his co-workers, and last week he did a radio show where he was interviewed along with another missioner.  He went on a waterfall hike last weekend with Pete Newburn that sounds like it was quite the adventure.  He describes tramping through the bush and I am thinking that I may need to get him a machete for Christmas.

I have been transitioning to my roles as homeschool teacher and “Archdiocesan pharmacist.”  I am loving homeschooling the kids.  It is so much fun being completely focused on their exploring minds.  I love learning and enjoy watching them make new discoveries.  We have also discovered a library and we have become members.  It is wonderful to have access to the wealth of books.

Work has begun, and there is quite a lot to be done.  The drug store or medical supply unit was mismanaged before I arrived.  Many drugs expired on the shelves and this has been very costly both financially and in reputation.  I am currently in the process of organizing everything and creating an inventory.  It is nice to know that I am filling a need.  I enjoy putting order to the chaos and I am hopeful that I will be able to rebuild the relationship with the outlying clinics and hospitals, so that the medical supply unit can be a service to them and their patients.  I do get to go to 3-4 of the outlying clinics every month.  I am grateful that I am able to do some direct patient care at these times.  (I miss direct patient care.)  I also am aware that doing complete patient care would be very difficult for me here.  

The average life expectancy in Cameroon is around 40.  It is heartbreaking to see the suffering and loss.  The first patient I cared for was at the clinic for the birth of her first child.  She had a beautiful baby boy.  A time for celebration, except the joy was tinged by deep sorrow.  The new mother had lost her husband to AIDs the day before (I think the stress may have brought on her labor).  While we cared for her and her new born baby (hopefully the anti-viral meds will prevent the spread of HIV to her son), her husband’s body was being prepared in the morgue.  This was my first experience with patient care, but unfortunately the story is not uncommon.

Thank you for you thought and prayers. 

-Maura

PS  Two days ago, when I was coming home from a clinic I saw a guy on a motorcycle with a full sized couch strapped to the seat of his motorcycle.  I have absolutely no idea how he fit in front of it or how he managed to balance the bike with the couch.  I am pretty sure he was the widest thing on the road. 

PPS  I am learning to remain calm with the little critters.  Last week I opened the drug store door and I felt something brush my shoulder as a lizard dropped to the ground.  I stifled a screech, took a couple deep breaths and then wondered how I was going to get it back in the store room.  I am counting on the lizards to eat the cockroaches.  Lizards are my friends.  

PPS  After completing this email on a Sunday, I began making pancakes for breakfast.  While I was waiting to flip the pancakes, I decided to wipe down the kitchen (we found a mouse last week and there was still evidence of him, although Ryan and I were proud of chasing him out of the kitchen with brooms).  I had gotten up on a stool to wipe down the top shelf.  My face was level with the shelf.  I moved some ziplock bags and a brown furry object catapulted towards my face.  Thankfully it missed and landed on my chest.  I did not stifle the SCREAM.  The mouse dropped to the floor and I left Ryan to chase it, while I moved to another room to do more screaming.  Ah Cameroon.  Our neighbors must think I am nuts.  They were convinced that I had burned myself.

I Gotta Guy

While working on the trading floor we would often say, “I gotta guy.”  This meant we had a person that would provide some type of service for you, such as a car mechanic or a florist.  It seemed whenever I needed something done I would ask around and eventually someone knew a person that could fit the bill.  Here I am many years from working on the trading floor but using the same line in Africa.  It seems there is a person for anything I need done while in Bamenda.  For instance if my cell phone stops working I know there is a “technician” that will fix it.  By technician I mean a young man sitting on the side of the road at a small wooden table with a screwdriver and pliers.  The miraculous thing is that he is able to fix phones otherwise he would be out of business, and we know someone that has used him.

We are grateful for the many people that assist us in making our life much easier.  Like in the U.S., we would be lost without our cell phones, so they were one of the first things we bought.  Cell phones are prepaid here and have to be filled quite regularly.  If one needs more minutes put on a phone he/she visits one of the countless people sitting on the side of the road at a rickety wooden table with a small sign of which cell phone company they provide minutes for.  There are two main companies and one newer, not as popular, so most people provide for the two popular companies.   On the table is usually two cell phones and nothing else unless the seller has expanded the business into selling other products such as gum, cigarettes, candy etc.  There are no neon signs, name tags of the representative, computers, receipt or anything else I am accustomed to in the U.S. The purchaser tells the seller how much money they would like to put on the phone and the phone number.  The seller picks up one of the cell phones and quickly types in the number and within seconds a message is sent saying how much money was put on the phone.  The process is simple, quick and easy with no signatures, identifications or questions about whether you would like to fill out a survey online. We were in need of refilling our minutes so we asked a local where to go.  Of course, he had a guy, so he took us to him and we refilled our minutes.  We were happy with the transaction and now we have a phone guy.  His name is Prince.  We have formed a relationship with Prince when we fill our phones or see him walking down the street with his young son.  When I went a bit longer between refills he inquired about my whereabouts.  If Maura visits him he tells her to greet me.  This is typical of how things are done here.  You find someone that treats you well and develop a relationship.

We have many other people in our life here that provide us services and products.  It has been pleasurable creating these relationships and having a person to buy from or do some type of work for us.  Remembering how and why we created these relationships is entertaining. One of our adventures was to have cloth napkins and an apron made.  In the market there is a whole row of women tailors that are eager to sew.  Maura and I casually walked down the aisle not having any intention of stopping but about half way down we were drawn to this one woman.  We told her what we wanted and she gave us her price.  We wanted to think about it and asked her name to come find her when we came back.  She told us her name is Irene.  I have never met an Irene before but my mother’s middle name is Irene.  We told Irene the significance of her name and she replied “Well, I am your mother now.”  It was quite humorous looking at this large African woman and imagining her being my mother, but I instantly had a connection to her and knew we had the woman to make the things we wanted.  Irene made us beautiful napkins and an apron.  She even made an apron for Honora because she met her. 

One day I decided I needed to get out of the house so I volunteered to go to the market.  Maura had her regular suppliers of groceries that she was happy with buying from, but I had not met any of them yet.  She gave me the list of items needed and the prices I should pay.  Together we had to go through the list to determine which vendor I would visit for each product.  This conversation resembled the “Who’s on First?” skit.  I had heard of these people before and had the layout of the market according to my visits, but translating those to Maura’s point of view was not that easy.  We used significant landmarks as the lady on the corner with the growths on her face or the sidewalk, which yes it is on the side of the street but you can’t really walk on it and I never knew it was considered a sidewalk because there are so many vendors selling things on it.  One item I was asked to buy was flour.  Maura buys flour from a particular woman that has clean products and good prices that we do not have to negotiate.  Since the woman’s name is Auntie Rosie I knew we were in good hands.  Rose is my sister’s name, Clare’s middle name and the middle name for three of my nieces.   Auntie Rosie has alleviated many headaches on where to find such products as eggs, propane and sugar so we will be loyal customers to her booth.  Next on the list was produce.  Produce is bought from the woman with the baseball hat and the scar on her face.  She stands just behind the woman with the growths on her face but on the other side of the “sidewalk.”  Maura continues to shop with her because she sells good produce and most importantly she is very kind and helpful.  She was excited to meet me and told me to greet Maura.  Now we know her name too (Belinda).

When we moved into our home everything was newly built.  All the furniture is handmade out of wood.  The furnishings in our home are much nicer than we had anticipated.  The Archbishop told us to let him know if there was anything else we needed.  We thought it would be nice to have a couple of desks and a counter in the kitchen so we made a request for these items.  To ensure we received what we wanted we were told to go to the carpenter to discuss with him our desires.  Now we have a carpenter, Michael, who built us two small tables for desks and a perfect set of selves that is our kitchen counter.  If we need anything else made of wood we know where to go.

We know we will continue to need more people to provide us whatever we are looking for and we have been given many recommendations.  Developing these relationships will be fun.  We are still having a difficult time retrieving the internet but supposedly there is “a guy” working on that for us.  We have not met him yet and have been patiently waiting for it to be installed in our house.  We just hope this “guy” will be a good recommendation and get it for us in the very near future.

Peace-

-Ryan (Maura’s guy)